Weird Intentions
by The Voices Talk to Me
Summary: Hallo all! It is The Awesome Prussia, and I'm here to tell you that I had no idea that all of this was gonna happen. It was the most surprising and epic shit that I've experienced in a long ass time. Basically just PrussiaxRomano smut. In an alley. In the dark. Read because you know that there's going to be arguing and fighting and lots of profanity.


**Uh, I stole this from QuietToxic. Well, the idea, that is. I was looking for inspiration for writing GerIta smut... and her beautiful little gem came up. So, please go read Italian Nature as well. She deserves props! And the whole, "What are you doing with my brother" to "Exactly, your ass" comments were hers. So, the stuff in "" was hers, but the other stuff was mine. Oh, and that stuff that happens at the bar is hers. *tear tear* She's so beautiful. The smut is all MINE! I dug into the deepest depths of my mind for this mansex!**

* * *

Hallo all! It is The Awesome Prussia, and I'm here to tell you that I had no idea that all of this was gonna happen. It was the most surprising and epic shit that I've experienced in a long ass time. I mean, I normally do some awesome stuff, because I'm Prussia and that's just me, but what happened was just mind blowing. I was just looking for someone to fuck, and Gott, did I get some ass! Look, I know that I like to get ass, you know that I like to get ass, Italy knows that I like to get ass, hell, even West knows that. I just didn't know it was going to go down like this. But it was exciting.

* * *

It was just another normal Saturday evening for me. That meant going somewhere downtown to get drunk off my ass and maybe find some to fuck. That meant finding a bar that would deal with me. It's not like I'm hard to deal with, though. I mean, I'm awesome! What's not to like about that?

So when I got there to the place, Inferno, I immediately went straight to the bar. Time for Rum and Cokes and Jello Shots! And most importantly, beer!

I was downing my R&C (haha, see what I did there? I abbreviated it, because I am awesome!) when I saw none other than Romano walking over.

"Hey, Romano!" I called to him. He looked over at me, looking really pissed off. I chuckled at him.

"What the fuck do you want, Potato Bastard?" he asked.

"That's my little brother. I'm Prussia the Awesome."

"I know that, fucktard bastard!"

I ignored what he had said. He was obviously ignoring me, too, for he went up to the bar to order a drink. I decided to start on my jello (isn't the idea of jello _and_ alcohol just _epic_?) shots. Romano downed his alcohol and then walked away. Hmm... that was weird... he normally goes and yells at me for a while. At least, that's what normally happens. So I decided to get up to follow him.

Germany and Italy were in the bar. Oh, man, this isn't for real! Italy had managed to drag my little brother into the bar with him! Luddy hardly ever goes drinking with him. I have to go see this...

I overheard Romano yelling at my brother.

"What are you doing with my brother, you potato bastard?"

Haha, West looked pissed at that. I could tell because he normally just ignores Romano.

"I could ask you the same thing." Germany said all cool and calm like.

That seemed to make Romano madder. He got all red in the face, and started yelling louder. "I am doing nothing with your damn brother.". He then turned behind to glare at me. How'd he know that I was behind him? But, still, it was funny, so I laughed.

"We just ran into each other, right? So we decided to have fun!"

"We did no such thing! You just decided to go and fucking stalk me!"

Why would I want to stalk him for? I mean, if anything, he should be stalking _me_. I mean, everybody wants a piece of my ass.

"Define stalking," I asked Romano, "This is a public place, you know. I have every right to be here."

He waved his arms around in that Italian way of his, "You're just following my ass around."

Oh, hey, more talk about ass! I smirked at him when he said that. "_Exactly_. Your ass."

"Fuck off, bastard!" Romano yelled. By now, Germany and Italy had managed to disappear from my sight.

"I thought you'd never ask!" I told Romano. That just made him even more pissed, and he came over to try to strangle me. I started to chuckle, and tried to pry his hands off of me.

"Hey, I know that you can't wait to put your hands all over me, but I bruise easily."

"That's the fucking point!"

Romano is stronger than what he appears to be. Which kinda meant that we ended up on the ground with his hands still around my neck. So, you know, since he's still trying to choke me, I decided to throw a punch to his face. It was more like a tap, I swear! But that just made him even more upset (how much anger can his small body hold?) and he tried to return the favor to me. He (unsuccessfully) swung at me, and before we knew it, someone was holding us up by the collar.

"Hey! Fuck off, that's Polo!" I yelled. Romano said something similar, but I think it was something Italian like "Fendi" or "Prada" or something like that.

"Get. The fuck. Out."

It was the bartender. He dropped the both of us (how'd he pick us both up?) back onto the ground, on our butts.

"See what you did, bastardo?" Romano hissed at me.

"Hey, you were the one trying to choke me." I told him.

"Yeah. I didn't try hard enough."

"Out!" the bartender yelled at us again, pointing to the exit. I got back up on my feet, dusting myself off, and sneered at him.

"It wasn't like the beer was very good."

Okay, so by now, my mood was starting to get rather pissed off. I mean, it wasn't like I bothered anybody, but yet _I_ get kicked outta here... man... where's the justice in that? But you know what, _fuck that shit_, I'm going to find somewhere _else_ to get drunk off my ass and to fuck! Uh, uh, yeah. I ended up trying to find another place to go. And I so _didn't_ stalk Romano, because when I left this place, he followed me to the exact bar I went to next. And he said that I was stalking him? Phaw shaw, get that weak shit outta here.

Yeah. And West and Italy also followed us there for some reason. I mean, I know that I'm awesome and all, but do I really need my little brother and his cute, adorable fuck buddy following me?

I ignored that, and headed straight towards the bar. And, good Gott, there was _German Beer_! This place was already starting to make me feel better. Romano was trailing behind me, and he had some Italian looking wine. (Don't ask me how it looks Italian. It just does.) He sat down two seats down from me.

"Who the hell drinks wine here?" I asked him.

"Obviously me, fucktard." he replied without even glancing over at me.

"I prefer 'The Awesomeness'." I correct him. He finally looked over and said, "You'll prefer whatever the hell I say."

I chuckled again. He was so feisty!

"How about this," I told him. He turned back to pay attention to me. "We're going to play a game, a drinking game, and if I win, then you have to call me 'The Awesomeness that is Prussia'. If you win, then you can call me whatever the hell you want."

"Great, bastard. It's not like I sit at home for hours on end drinking beer or anything."

"Hey, I don't do that!"

"Right." Romano told me. There was a pause before I heard him mutter under his breath, "Fine."

"Awesome!" I shouted, then ushering (did you see that word? It was nice, wasn't it?) him towards the bartender.

* * *

Augh... why did I even think of doing this? I mean, for such a small man, he can down some drinks. And fight. Oh, how that little fucker can fight... I groaned, lifting my head up from the table. Looking around, I noticed that West was approaching the table, and that Italy was still here. Romano was still smirking, leaning back in his chair as if he accomplished something. As if. He cheated! He cheated, I swear!

I overheard Germany talking to Italy about something. From the sounds of it, Italy was drunk and my brother was trying to get him home. I wouldn't be surprised if they got home and immediately went to the bed. Or, maybe even in the car, knowing them.

Romano leaned over and tapped me on the shoulder.

"What?" I asked.

"You lost."

"Ja, thanks for remind me."

"Yeah bastard. Now I guess you're not getting the ass that you wanted."

I grinned. I had forgotten all about that, too!

I slowly raised my upper body from off the table and asked Romano, "You know what?" His smirked lessened, favoring a more quizzical look on his face and said, "What?"

"I'm still gonna kiss you."

Romano jumped up, panic on his face. "No-no you're not b-b-bastard!" he pointed at me. I smirked.

"Oh, but I am." I jumped up with him. He was already running and I was gladly chasing right after him.

He ran through several groups of people, who seemed very angry at us for shouting and yelling and interrupting their conversations (not like it could possibly be about something important). Romano then ended up running out the back door of the place, and slammed it shut. I almost face planted into it, but I was quick enough on my feet to avoid that.

It was much cooler outside than what it was inside. It was slightly breezy, too, and humid. I looked around for Romano; he was nowhere to be found out here.

"Romano!" I called out, stepping away from the door. I thought I had heard him rustle around but it was a bird. (What birds should be out at nine fifty pm anyways?) "Romano!" I yelled again. I heard someone trip. I jogged towards the sound, and yes, he was on the ground.

"Fuck." he swore while trying to get back up.

"Not so quick." I told him, quickly moving down to his level. I tried to tackle him, but he fought back.

"Off! Off! Get off me, bastard!"

"Aww, you don't want The Awesome Prussia?" I asked. He was underneath me, with me straddling him. His eyes squinted at me, and he scowled.

"Fuck. No." he then threw a solid punch (I can't remember if it was right or left) that connected squarely with my jaw. I fell back, clutching my injury. Romano took that to his advantage and escaped from underneath me. He crawled over to where I was sitting on the ground, then hovered over my lap and put his hands on my shoulders. Romano smirked and shoved my back on the ground.

He asks me, "How's this?" before starts to grind on my lap.

"Great." I respond, already starting to feel aroused from his activity and ignoring the pain that's still pulsing on my chin. I reach towards his hips to try to get him to move faster, but he swats my hands away. I groan and my own hips buckle up. Romano pushes them back down and holds them in place.

"W-what gives?" I ask him.

"Payback. From earlier." he tells me. His lips crashed onto mine. I wasn't expecting that, so I gasped, and he used that to his advantage to shove his tongue into my mouth. I moaned once more as Romano ground on my erection.

As our tongues fought for dominance, Romano's hands roamed over my chest. They reached to find the bottom hem of my shirt and pulled it over my head, breaking our kiss for only a moment. I briefly remembered that we were still in in the ally outside the bar and that he just threw my expensive shirt onto the ground, but when he started kissing down my neck, I forgot all of those troubles.

His mouth traveled all around my neck and chest, occasionally biting where he deemed acceptable. He kissed where he had previously punched me, making sure to be tender towards the injury. Romano moved down and put his lips to my nipples, flicking them with his tongue and suckling them when he chose. He moved further south, down my torso and to my navel. His hand brushed the front of my jeans, touching my hardened length. I made an embarrassing sound, something like a mix between a moan and a whimper. Romano looked up when I did that, smirking at me.

"Happy, aren't we?" he asks.

"Ja. Very much." I tell him, not even concerned with saying anything smart. Romano goes back to his previous activity, and he starts to unbutton my jeans. I wriggle out of them as he tugs down, my erection springing out to meet him.

"Very happy." Romano says as he gets to work, removing my boxers along the way. His hand went over my cock, rubbing the head oh so slowly. He takes his time, fingering the vein on the side, caressing my balls and testing their weight. My member is throbbing by the time Romano's mouth encloses around it. My hips buck up, shoving myself further down Romano's throat. I hear a slight choking sound before he roughly slams my hips back onto the ground and pins them down.

"S-sorry." I manage to choke out. Romano continues with bobbing his head up and down on me, clearly ignoring what happened. My hands grab onto fistfuls of his auburn hair.

This had to be some form of heaven. Like, heaven on earth. This was just _amazing_. Awesome in every way possible. The heat was so intense, surrounding my entire member, and how it was pooling in my groin. I was moaning and grunting the entire time his mouth was on me. I thrust up to his touch again, but this time he happily complied. Romano pushed his mouth further down until his nose was touching my abdomen. He continued in this way until I let out a choke cry and arched up.

"_Ah!_" I yelled as I came. I could feel how great the release was, and how Romano was taking it all in. My back finally touched back with the ground and I exhaled. Romano stood up on his knees with some of my seed dribbling down his chin. I gave him a weak smile.

"That was great." I told him. He rolled his eyes, wiped his chin off and said, "Just turn over."

I sat up and asked "Why?". Romano scoffed as he started taking off his pants. "So I can fuck you, idiot."

_He_ was going to fuck me? That meant that he would have to top! Romano topping me? The Awesome Prussia? The Awesome Prussia does not simply get topped! I conquer! I steal vital regions and claim them as mine! I have nine meters of awesomeness! I can not just let him – or anyone for that matter – top me! I must be the one whom tops! It is the only right way.

As I was debating this to myself, I only slightly heard Romano shouting at me. I did eventually hear him. I focused on his face and the words coming out his mouth.

"Bastard, fucking turn around!" he shouts at me, to which I smirk at.

"How come I'm the one naked?" I ask him.

"Because you fucking wanted me?"

"So, isn't it unfair that you're still clothed?"

"Just fucking turn your ass around."

"_No_." I told him in the sternest voice that I could muster. He looked shocked, obviously forgetting that _I_ top people. _I_ dominate.

"What the hell do you mean _No_?"

"I mean no. Plain and simple."

He scowled at me and began taking off his shirt. "Are you happy now Prussia?" he takes off his boxers, flinging them to an unknown place beyond us. His own length is semi-hard. "We're both naked. _Now_ turn your ass around."

"I had other plans." I announced to him, slowly crawling towards him. I could hear his breath hitch slightly as I approached closer.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing bastard."

My lips touch his once more and he complies with me. I push him back onto the ground, and our kiss deepened. He was fiercely trying to dominate my own mouth. His tongue exploring all throughout my mouth. I could faintly taste the remains of my seed in his mouth, and all I could say is that it turned me on even more.

I moved to his neck, making sure to make as many marks as possible on it. He moans when I start sucking on his nipple. I skim the bud with my tongue, making sure to flick it and swirl it around in my mouth. Romano grunts a word, and grips tightly to my hair. I move onto the other nipple, and I can feel as his lower region swells to poke up at my own erection.

Traveling lower, I explore the rest of his torso. The contours of his muscularity, the heat that radiates off of him, there are so many details about the Italian that I'm currently ravaging that it's almost overwhelming. Romano obviously thinks so, too. He moans as I continue downward, his grip still tight to my hair. I brush over the tip of his length, dragging my tongue over the head. It's his own turn to buck upwards when my mouth touches his cock. One of my hands reach to steady his hips and the other grips to the base of his member.

"_Fuck._" he groans, yanking at my hair and hips still trying to arch up closer to my mouth. I try to tell him, "How's this?", but I forget that I currently have my mouth full. Instead, it comes out as a muffled sound. Lovino shouts again, and I realize that it was from the vibrations of me trying to speak. I smirk at this fact, and begin humming.

"_Ah_, bastard!" he says. "I'm going, I'm going, to –"

I quickly pull him out of my mouth, and flip him around.

"Not yet, you're not." I tell him as I reach towards my pants. I find them, and quickly locate the bottle of lube that I was looking for.

"What the fuck gives?" he looks and whispers to me.

"Together." I tell him as I start to slicked my fingers. "We're gonna cum together."

"Fuck cumming together. Let me cum _now_." he growls the last word.

"Yeah, yeah. Soon enough." I say, slipping one finger into him. I wiggle it around a little before adding the second one. He looks up at me impatiently as I begin scissoring him.

"Faster." he tells me.

I smirk and added a third finger. His breath hitched, and he arched up towards me. I chuckled and searched around for his spot.

"I wonder why three is the magic number." I say out loud. Romano starts wiggling around my fingers, trying to get me to touch his prostate.

"Because, it's the only – _ahh_!" he moans. I grin, realizing that I've (or rather, he) found his prostate. I pull my fingers back slightly, and make sure to hit his spot again. He moans, louder than earlier. This time I pull my fingers out all the way, and squirt a sizable amount of lube onto my hand. I let it warm up a bit, and then slick up my cock.

"Ready?" I ask him.

"Just fuck me already." he pants as he tries to command me. I line my length up to his hole, noticing how he was already twitching in anticipation for me and my cock.

"Gladly." I tell him, and thrust. And was he _tight_. And warm. And just amazing. His wonderful, warm, amazing heat was wrapped all around me.

"_Move_." Romano barks. And 'move' is what I did. I quickly moved out, and then entered his body again. And again. Faster and faster I moved, making sure to hit his prostate as dead-on as possible. He grunted and moaned every time I slammed down. I reached to his front, to fondle with his cock. I resume with the hand job at the same time as thrusting into him. Romano makes a very lewd sound as I brush over the head, and he jerks back.

We continue this rhythm until I feel a familiar heat coil up in my cock. My movements become more frantic, and I can tell that I'm about to cum. With just a few more thrusts, Romano releases first. He sputters all over my hand, and then I soon follow suit in him.

He sighs and slopes down onto the cement-asphalt ground below.

"Fuck." he says in the most tired sound voice I've heard in a while.

"That was... great..." I say, and my tone is similar to his. He rolls around to face me and scowls. Then he looks around.

"Where the hell are we?"

I look around with him.

"A ally? A fucking _ally_? We fucked in a _ally_?" I think he's too tired to even look pissed, because he's just squinting his eyes in the most confused (and cute) way. Romano tried to hoist himself up, using me as his support. He got up slowly and was still wobbling a bit. I smirked at him and all of his stark naked glory.

"You fucked me in a ally? The hell?" He tries to look for his clothing. "You threw my shirt in a fucking puddle!"

I stood up, wiping the gravel and God-knows-what off my bum and legs, and went over to Romano.

"And not just any puddle; this shit just isn't water, it's _oil_. It's some goddamned _oil_." he looks down at the shirt and picks it up, then tries to shake the oil out of it.

"S'not so bad." I try to tell him. I find my own shirt, safely thrown on a plank of wood, and put it on.

"That was fucking Armani. Armani. Gilbert, do you even understand what that means?"

"That it's expensive. Ja, ja, spare me the suspense. Or expensive."

"Not funny." he tells me as he picks up his underwear off the ground. "And I have cum dripping out my ass."

"You're welcome."

"Still not funny."

After some time in silence, we start trying to find our way back towards the bar.

"Call your brother." Romano tells me.

"I'm pretty sure that he and your brother left already." I try to inform him.

"Call the potato bastard."

"Right after we find where we're at."

"The idiot has the brilliant idea to fuck me where he doesn't even know where we're at."

* * *

Fifteen ignored calls to Ludwig later, I was at Romano's house, happily cuddling with him on his bed. Of course he would scowl and say something snarky and mean, but for the most part, he was happy, too.

Feli wasn't here, and judging from West not answering his phone (He _never_ misses phone calls unless something major happened) I'm pretty sure what they did. Hint, hint.

So, you know, this was a pretty good day. I drank, fought, got kicked out a bar, chased a sexy Italian, and got some ass today. In all, this was actually a very awesome, successful night.

And did I mention that I got some ass? Yeah...

* * *

**Uh. Yeah. I just needed to get this the *hell* off my computer. It was annoying me that I didn't finish this earlier. But thanks again to QuietToxic for the inspiration.**

**If it seemed rushed, then, yeah. Oh well. Be appreciative of the smut. XD  
**

**I'll do something else later. Much later. Much later on in my life. Soon enough. :-)**

**What's with ? I mean, it's changing in every possible way. It's starting to look like... *shudders*... facebook. Oh Gawd...**

**Review below!**


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